Breaking the Silence

For once in the year of my life since I started blogging, I really did have a lot to write about. I did a lot of thinking about writing, but I didn't actually do it. And not because I was afraid of baring my soul on the broad public stage of the Internet. I was actually concerned about the more private circle of people I know who know about my blog. Just like there are some things you shouldn't put in a bathtub, there are some things you shouldn't put in a blog -- namely, things you don't want people to read about before you've had a chance to tell them.

So for a long time I didn't write about how badly my Thanksgiving trip really made me want to move back to the coast, about how I'd started thinking that my time in Memphis was maybe finally drawing to a close. I didn't write about knowing that I'd have to move on alone, and how I felt about the fact that I knew that.

I didn't even write about the grand scheme I concocted for running into Brad Pitt in New Orleans over Christmas so he could hire me to run his community development project and go back to making movies and/or babies. Despite his rumored success with the latter, I did not actually see him while I was in New Orleans. Perhaps that's for the best, though, because it would have really complicated my best friend's plans to have Angelina Jolie play me when he exercises his option on the movie rights to my life story.

So I spent way too much time being in a funk about the fact that I had to make Major Life Decisions without any of the vices that I've always employed in the Major Life Decision-
making process: cigarettes, excessive amounts of alcohol, and long, rambling diatribes on how bad I am at making Major Life Decisions. But then, as always seems to happen to me, Life offered me an apparent no-brainer through a laughably bizarre coincidence that really just might have been divine intervention. Especially since I think my current boyfriend is God's way of allowing me to do penance on earth for every bad thing I've ever done in a relationship.

I am still getting slightly ahead of myself at this point, so I can't quite divulge all the details just yet. But let's just say that the no-brainer in question made it a lot easier for my head to want to stay where my heart happens to think that it belongs. More to come...

Today is the first day of Lent, the forty-day period for which I have decided to give up both chocolate candy and fast food. The former choice was prompted by the steady supply of temptation that has been lingering in our office since Halloween. The latter is supposed to compel me to save money by (a) bringing my lunch to work instead of going to the Taco Bell near my office and (b) cooking dinner at night instead of going to one of the two Taco Bells near my apartment. Somehow I think the more likely result is that I will spend twice as much on sushi as I would have on chalupas.

It feels good to have finally done this. Time to head to the grocery store to stock up on temptation-thwarters.